This story is about a pink balloon.
On Tuesday, October 29th, I went to downtown Pittsburgh with my mom, a pastor friend and two friends from our church to stand in front of the Planned Parenthood facility on Liberty Avenue in the heart of the city for two hours. It was day 35 of the 40-Days-for-Life Campaign, which is an annual ministry that takes place in September-October to help end abortion in our city...and beyond. I took part in this last year as well. Those of us that feel called to do this, take turns in shifts to keep vigil outside the facility because that is where abortions are performed almost daily. It is a very peaceful and prayerful time to be a visible witness outside the doors and offer support and help to any women who may be going into the facility to have an abortion.
When we first arrived at Planned Parenthood to take over for our shift, I noticed a young couple with a baby in a stroller talking very excitedly to one of the women that had been standing in front of the facility as part of the ministry. Hugs were exchanged between them and photos were being taken. I overheard the young woman saying that her baby was here because of this ministry, and particularly because of the woman she was talking to. When she was about 10 weeks into her pregnancy, or so she thought, she had come to this facility to have an abortion. She explained that she had been at a very different place in her life at the time and made the decision to go forth with the abortion. But, when she arrived there, this woman...along with others...had been standing outside praying and began witnessing to her about the value of her baby's life. This young woman then decided to not go through with the abortion and was even given a baby blanket from the woman that ministered to her. Now her son is 9 months old and she stated that he was the best thing that has ever happened to her. She was so thankful that this woman talked her out of it and she wanted to come and personally thank her and introduce her to her son, who would not be here today if it weren't for her. You can read the full story here.
I was so happy for this woman and her child, and relieved to hear that what we do actually makes a difference. But my heart became heavy once again, remembering how much I missed my own baby and how I would give anything to have the chance to have her with me like this woman got to have her son with her.
As I was standing there listening, I noticed that someone had a display out on the sidewalk of models that look like babies at different stages in the pregnancy. The models were very life-like, and there was one at the stage of about 24 weeks that was the exact size that Anna was when I delivered her. Seeing this added to my sadness and I had to turn away so no one would see the tears forming in my eyes. I then grabbed one of the signs that said, "Jesus loves your baby and so do we" and took my place near the front entrance of the facility and began praying. But my prayers were interrupted with my own thoughts and I began questioning the Lord again.
"Lord, once again I stand here defending the preciousness of life, trying to be a witness to others so that they will not end the life that has been created inside of them. I've been a part of the pro-life ministry for many years. You know this. Yet, why is it that I was not allowed to keep the life that was inside of me?"
This conversation with the Lord went on as I silently poured my heart out to him for the millionth time. Just like the line in my song, "I ask You, my truest and deepest love, for an answer, comfort, sign from above...."
Suddenly, amidst the very chaotic and noisy street, filled with tons of traffic...trucks, taxi cabs, people hustling about...something caught my eye across the way. On the other side of the busy street, I saw a pink balloon come bouncing along the ground around the corner of a very tall building. The balloon stopped right at the sidewalk corner, near a newspaper stand. My thoughts came to a halt and I just stared at it.
What was a balloon...a PINK balloon...doing in the middle of the city? There was no logical explanation to where it may have come from. But there it was, perfectly still for the moment, begging for a gush of wind from a travelling car to whip it out onto the street and get squished by the traffic.
The only thought in my head was, "No way."
And wouldn't you know that after a few minutes, that pink balloon began bouncing its way toward the street in front of me and somehow managed to make it all the way across without getting squished or blown away in another direction?
And then that pink balloon stopped right in front of where I was standing.
I looked over at the pastor that was standing near me and he just smiled. He saw the whole thing too.
I bent down and picked up the balloon and held it in my hand for the next two hours, while I stood and prayed for all the babies who have lost their lives because of abortion and for all the babies yet to be saved. I didn't know what the balloon meant, but I know in my heart that the Lord was telling me that He heard my prayers. And I can't help but think that Anna had something to do with that too. I've known since the day that we lost her that she is now an angel in Heaven, watching over her Daddy and I. And I truly believe that she is a direct connection that I have to my Lord now.
As I stood there, holding the pink balloon, I said one last prayer:
"I love you too, Anna."
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